Starbright Read online

  The sounds Aidan made were unlike anything she’d ever heard from him before. His lips drifted to her ear, his warm, heavy breaths giving her goose bumps.

  “I want to make you feel good.” He threaded his hands into her hair and matched her movements, rocking her gently against the dresser.

  Beth gasped. “You do, Aidan. Only you.”

  Aidan placed his hands on her hips as she stood on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around his neck. That was when she felt his arousal again. It pressed between her legs in that perfect spot, in the most perfect way, escalating her desire and shredding the apprehension she felt with him on the bed as if it was made of tissue paper.

  Beth lifted one leg and hooked it around his hip, curious as to where else they could take this. Aidan grunted and grabbed her thigh, rustling her dress as he hitched her leg higher and wrapped his other hand around her waist to pull her closer. She bucked her hips against him, feeling him hard and thick under his pants and pushing where she wanted him most.

  Aidan dropped his head to her shoulder.

  “Oh, fuc… aaahh, Beth…” He tightened his grip on her thigh and ground against her again.

  The sensation that rippled throughout Beth’s body made her tremble, and the foot that remained on the floor struggled to keep her upright. She clutched Aidan’s sweater, desperate not to break the contact between them. The expression on his face was a concoction of pleasure and pain as she moved her hips against him again. Then his entire demeanor shifted.

  “No!” With a low growl, Aidan pushed away from her, releasing his hand from her thigh and driving it into his hair.

  Beth’s foot dropped to the floor. She shot her hands out behind her and caught the vanity to keep from falling over. The throbbing between her legs dominated all of her thoughts, making comprehension impossible.

  “We have to stop.” Aidan’s chest heaved with his throaty proclamation. He took another step back, increasing the gap between them at a time when Beth wanted him closer than ever.

  The distance provided space for reality and sanity to enter. Her hand flew to her mouth. What had she done? She grew up with the understanding that such things occurred between a husband and wife only. She was becoming more liberal regarding intimacy before marriage, and with Aidan’s help, realized her desires for him were normal and nothing to be ashamed about, but this was still much too big a step for her to take at the moment.

  Beth let go of the vanity carefully and corrected her stance. Aidan paced before her with long, impatient strides and raked his hands through his hair, his lips pressed together in a firm line.

  Beth straightened her dress, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “Aidan, I—I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

  Aidan stopped walking, still breathing heavily. “Please don’t misunderstand my actions.” Torment battled the longing in his eyes. “I want you. I’ve never wanted anyone more in my entire life, and I didn’t want to stop.” He closed his eyes momentarily, a groan escaping his lips. “Damn it, you have no idea how much I didn’t want to stop. But if I didn’t, then we’d be back on your bed, and right now, that’s not where we should be. You’re not ready, you made that clear earlier, and as the man in the relationship, it’s my responsibility to do what’s best for you, to take care of you.” He took her hands in his, bringing them to his lips for a kiss. “I don’t want you to get caught up in the moment and do something you’ll regret later.”

  “Thank you, Aidan.” Beth’s blush deepened with the recollection of her actions. “I’m sorry for pushing you and forcing you to be the one to make this decision.”

  “Trust me, baby, I’m not sorry about what happened. It felt amazing. You feel amazing. But that’s the problem. It felt too amazing and I lost control, especially after you did that… that thing with your leg.” He shook his head, as if he was trying to rid himself of the memory, though his expression told her it wasn’t because he didn’t like what she’d done.

  “I’m grateful you had the strength to be the responsible one,” she said.

  “It wasn’t easy, believe me.” Aidan thrust his hands into his hair again. “Just give me a moment to calm down, okay?” He closed his eyes and exhaled a cavernous breath.

  “Calm down?” Beth’s eyes traveled across his face, down his chest and stomach to his—

  Her breath hitched.

  He was still erect.

  Now that she could actually see the outline of him under his pants, she had confirmation of what she’d assumed earlier: He was very well endowed. From what Connie told her, a well-endowed man was a very good thing.

  “This is what you do to me,” Aidan said softly. “I don’t even have to touch you. Just the thought or sight of you arouses me.”

  Beth averted her gaze, embarrassed that he’d caught her staring at him. The thing that surprised her was he didn’t look the least bit ruffled by it. She knew then he was right for stopping them when he did. If she couldn’t even look at his erection concealed by his pants without blushing, then she was not ready to go beyond kissing with him.

  Beth gave Aidan his requested moment to calm down and used the time to settle her own emotions. How, in one instant, could she feel hesitant about intimacy, and the next, act like a physically starved woman who’d push the boundaries and act so differently from her usual character?

  After a minute or so, Aidan pulled her close and tucked her against his chest, resting his chin on the top of her head. The pleasurable way her body responded immediately to him told her that such a transformation wasn’t as farfetched as she had assumed.

  Beth jumped out of Aidan’s arms when she heard the front door slam shut.

  “Gee, tonight was fun!” Olivia’s loud pronunciation was abnormally slow and deliberate. “I think I’ll go to sleep now—in my bedroom—which is right next to Beth’s bedroom.” The volume of her voice increased. “Therefore, I must walk past her room to get to mine!”

  Beth giggled at Olivia’s dramatics. She was grateful, though, that her friend was courteous enough to let them know she was back instead of returning unannounced and catching them in a compromising position.

  “Liv, it’s all right,” Beth called. “You can come in. Aidan and I are just talking.”

  Olivia poked her head around the corner, her hand covering her eyes. She separated her forefinger and middle finger and peered at them through the crack.

  “Oh, good. You’re decent!” With a smile, she dropped her hand and stepped out into full view.

  Beth laughed. “Liv, I told you, Aidan and I were just—”

  “Yes, I know, talking.” Olivia gave a casual gesture of her hand. “But tell me something, Beth, since when does your hair tangle, your lips puff up, and your shoes fall off from just talking?”

  Beth looked down at her stocking feet. Her cheeks flamed for the umpteenth time this evening.

  A knowing smirk played across Olivia’s face. “That must’ve been some conversation.”

  Aidan placed his hand to the small of Beth’s back and chuckled. “She’s got you there, baby.”

  Olivia wiggled her fingers in a playful wave. “Good night, you two.”

  She skipped off to her bedroom.

  Beth suppressed a groan. She would have a lot of explaining to do tomorrow.

  Aidan’s hand traveled up her back to her shoulder, where he gave an affectionate squeeze. “I should get going.”

  “Right now?”

  He regarded her apologetically. “I don’t want to, but I also don’t want you to be tired tomorrow.”

  Beth noted the late hour displayed on the bedside clock. Once again, he was being the responsible one. She had to start making the same effort.

  She offered a compliant smile. “I’ll walk you out.”

  After putting her shoes back on, she accompanied Aidan to the foyer.

  “Let me escort you to your car, or motorcycle, whatever you drove here,” she said on her way to the closet to fetch her coat.

 
To her dismay, Aidan shook his head. “I wouldn’t feel comfortable not knowing if you made it back to your apartment safely.”

  “You could call me when you got home, that way you’d know I’m all right.” Beth peered at him hopefully. She wanted to delay their separation as long as possible.

  Aidan fixed her with a look that told her she wasn’t going to win this one.

  “You should get to bed. You need your rest. Plus, if something happened to you in the time it took me to drive home…” His face darkened, indicating the silence that followed was occupied by a disturbing thought. When his eyes met hers again, they were soft and admiring. “Please say good-bye to me here, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Beth frowned. “Tomorrow I’m at the studio from six in the morning until at least ten at night. Mr. Mertz wants us to make up for the time we lost by having today off.”

  Aidan’s jaw clenched. “You shouldn’t have to work such long hours. It’s not right.”

  “I know, but having Thanksgiving fall on a Thursday every year means one full day less of filming.” Beth shrugged. “I’m just grateful I had today off so I could see you and spend time with our friends.”

  The anger waned in Aidan’s expression, although he still didn’t seem to fully accept her justification. “How about Saturday?” he said, taking her into his arms. “I’m gonna ask Nate and Matt to help me with the move, that way I’ll have more time to spend with you.”

  “Saturday sounds wonderful,” Beth replied. “Olivia wants to show me the house she spoke about over dinner, but otherwise I’m free.”

  Aidan’s face alighted like the stars. “Perfect.”

  When he pulled away and opened the door, Beth felt his absence all the way through her. She tried to quell the ache by reminding herself of their weekend plans.

  Aidan stopped in the doorway and rested his forearm on the doorframe above his head. He leaned forward until she felt his warm breath on her face.

  “Thank you for a wonderful evening.” He brushed his lips to hers, followed by her cheek.

  “I’m going to miss you, Aidan. I—” Emotion came on quick and thick, pilfering her voice from her.

  “Whether we’re together or apart, you’re always with me.” He took her hand and placed it over his heart. “Always.”

  Beth felt his pulse under her touch as strongly as if she held his heart in her hand. At the fierce reminder that she wouldn’t be with him tonight when she laid down to sleep, went to work in the morning, or arrived home tomorrow night, she felt on the verge of tears. Now that they had reunited, she didn’t know how she’d managed without him.

  Aidan dropped his arm from the doorframe to take her cheek in his hand. “Please don’t cry, baby.” He brought his lips to hers again. His agony over their impending separation was evident in the grimace that graced his face when he pulled back. With great resolve, he looked into her eyes. “We’ll get through it, okay? I promise we’ll see each other again soon.”

  Beth nodded, unable to concur aloud.

  After another lingering kiss, Aidan backed away from her and out of the apartment, breaking all physical contact between them. Beth’s heart remained warm with the memory of his touch. She would harbor it within her until she saw him again.

  Aidan stopped in the hallway and stared at her, his hands resting in his pockets, his posture solemn.

  “Good night, little dove,” he said softly.

  “Good night, Aidan.” Beth’s voice wavered under the weight of her sorrow.

  Following his departure, she locked up and rested her forehead against the door, releasing a quivering breath. If she wanted to learn more about how to please a man properly and rid herself of her nervousness before spending the night with Aidan in Santa Barbara, she needed to take Olivia up on the offer to have the talk. Pronto.

  “Penis.”

  “P… Penis.”

  Olivia’s eyes narrowed. “Again.”

  “P–penis,” Beth repeated.

  “Better, but still not great,” Connie said. “Try again. But this time, don’t hesitate.”

  Beth exhaled a shaky breath and looked around Connie’s bedroom, anywhere but at her two friends sitting across from her.

  “Penis,” she said with a firm nod.

  Olivia traded glances with Connie. “That one wasn’t bad.”

  Beth sighed. “I don’t see what this has to do with me becoming more intimate with Aidan.”

  “If you can’t even say the word, how are you ever going to feel comfortable with him in an intimate situation?” Olivia replied.

  Connie smirked. “Yes, if you want to touch it, you have to be able to say the word out loud first.”

  Beth gaped at her friends. “Goodness, we’re a long way off from… from that!”

  Connie shook her head. “You say that now, but once you two are in the throes of passion, things may move quicker than you expected.”

  Beth related Connie’s comments to her experience with Aidan on Thanksgiving. Her friend was right.

  “What’s next on the list?” Olivia asked.

  Connie consulted her notepad. “Vagina.”

  A blush flooded Beth’s cheeks. She wished she was spending her Saturday afternoon elsewhere. Even helping Nathan and Matthew with Aidan’s move appealed to her more.

  “Perfect!” Olivia’s eyes danced with excitement. “All right, Beth. Say it.”

  “Vagina.”

  Olivia shrieked and jumped out of her chair. “You said it without hesitating! I told you this was going to benefit you.”

  Beth eyed her friend skeptically. Saying the word was one thing. Exposing herself in front of Aidan was another.

  Olivia sat back down and folded her hands in her lap. “I think we can move on from the list.”

  Connie tossed a smile in Beth’s direction. “How about you pick up the book again and read the next paragraph.”

  “Oh, I don’t know…” Beth stared at the romance novel resting in her lap. The cover featured an illustration of a muscular, half-naked man and a curvaceous woman clutched in an intimate embrace. His lips pressed to her chest and her face looked to the heavens, her eyes closed and her mouth open in a way that suggested she was releasing an erotic cry.

  Connie and Olivia stopped Beth from reading the book aloud after she stumbled through the word clitoris. Based on her mispronunciation, Connie knew Beth had no idea what it was and insisted she receive a proper explanation. After a very graphic description from Olivia and a tutorial from Connie on how it was the secret to a woman’s pleasure, they moved on to Connie’s body parts list, which had been compiled especially for today’s session. Beth had hoped they’d forgotten about the novel.

  With a trembling hand, she reopened the book and found her starting point. “His finger swirled around my clit… clitoris, making my body quake with pleasure, as his lips drifted down my neck,” she read. “His soft kisses and sensual touch made my vagina moist and I felt my wetness dripping down onto his hand, coating him in my essence.”

  Beth made a sour face at the description. “I was ready to take his penis inside me whenever he pleased. Desire burned in my veins as his mouth moved lower. The anticipation drove me wild. He stopped just above my breasts. My nipples tingled as he cupped his supple lips over one of my peaks and…”

  Beth cleared her throat. “… Kneaded his palm to my other breast with an animalistic passion that only made me want him more. He slipped two fingers inside me, and I moaned with pleasure.” She scanned the next few words. “I’m sorry, but I can’t read the rest.”

  “You can’t stop now,” Connie said. “You’re just getting to the good part!”

  “Yes, but—”

  “No buts, Beth.” Olivia wagged a finger at her. “This is for your own good.”

  Beth looked at the page again. “He sucked hard on my breast and swirled his hot tongue around my nipple. My vagina throbbed for him as I moved against his rock hard body. I needed more. I needed to feel his penis inside
me immediately. ‘Please, Fabio, take me now,’ I begged.”

  “Try to steady your voice and read with more expression,” Connie said gently.

  Beth shifted in her seat and resumed. “He removed his mouth from my breast and slipped his fingers out of my vagina. ‘All right, doll,’ he said, his deep voice the perfect pairing to the hot hunk of man he was.”

  Connie and Olivia leaned forward in their seats.

  “Flexing his pectoral muscles, he looked down at me, his eyes dark with lust. He rubbed his hand down his rippled abdominals, to his groin, stopping at his,” Beth gulped, “erect penis. He took his length in his hand and stroked himself slowly. I watched in wonder as he worked himself hard. He looked like an Adonis, my own personal Greek god sent to Earth strictly for my pleasure. ‘Lie down on your back and spread your legs, Betsy,’ he said in a low growl. ‘It’s about time you found out what a real man feels like.’ ”

  Beth shut the book in disgust. “I can’t read this! Spread your legs, Betsy… It’s about time you found out what a real man feels like?” She scoffed. “How ridiculous!”

  Connie sighed. “Fabio is so sexy.”

  Olivia perched her chin in her palm and stared across the bedroom. “I miss Nathan.”

  Beth regarded her friends in disbelief. “How can you possibly think this novel is romantic?”

  Connie raised her eyebrows. “Are you telling me you’ve never had dreams where a man has taken control of your body and ravished you?”

  Beth crossed her arms over her chest and huffed. “No, I have not. When I dream of Aidan and me together, we’re always engaged in tender moments. Dream Aidan is never a brute like Fabio.”

  Connie giggled. “Just because a woman fantasizes about raunchy sex every now and then doesn’t mean she’s any less respectable.”

  Beth frowned. “I know, but I prefer Aidan’s gentleness. I don’t want to change him, even in my dreams. He’s wonderful as he is.”

  Connie rolled her eyes.

  “I understand,” Olivia said. “I enjoy Nathan’s gentleness, too, and would never want him to talk and act like Fabio. It’s all right in novels or motion pictures, but in real life, you want a gentleman.”